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DRUNK EX-PASTORS

Culture. Politics. Religion. Bieber.

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Podcast #78: Patriotism or Christianity?

We begin this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors with one final bit of blowback from our interview with Cash Peters—and this one’s priceless—which leads us into a reflection about the Fundamentalist’s pathological need to find a threat or demon lurking behind every tree (can’t an innocent erotic chakra massage be religiously neutral? Geez. Relax, people). We then banter a bit about the new Star Wars film and address a caller’s feedback about Princess Leia’s collagen-filled lips, after which we take another call about the personal and relational price of no longer towing the religious party line. Another listener’s question about Jerry Falwell Jr. and Liberty University’s open-carry gun policy leads to an in-depth discussion about Christianity and … [Read more...]

Podcast #77: Star Wars, Hitler, and Princess Leia’s Lips

This episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors begins with an in-depth breakdown of the New Star Wars film that neither of us had seen yet (turns out it was awesome), after which we debrief a bit about the Cash Peters interview from our last show. Christian then describes how his company does “mission trips,” which is weird since it makes no sense to do nice things for underprivileged people when you hate Jesus. We address a caller’s observation that we are “sarcastic” (wow, you figure that out on your own, genius?), and then address Bernie Sanders’s suggestion that ISIS was caused by styrofoam Big Mac containers and AquaNet. We then turn to the question of how alike Trump and Hitler are on a scale of 6-10, after which we springboard from Princess Leia’s … [Read more...]

Podcast #76: Guest Cash Peters

In this episode, the DXPs welcome mystic, TV personality, radio host, handwriting analyst, and author Cash Peters into the studio (he’s kind of like the Dos Equis “Most Interesting Man in the World” guy, just with a British accent and teeth). In our first hour, Cash analyses our handwriting and is deeply surprised by what he learns about Jason (although Christian thinks the analysis was pretty much right on target). After our break Cash describes his experience visiting the healer John of God in Brazil (do true healings happen there? Are they attributable to God?), after which we again return to Jason and what a frustrating experience he makes listening to this show to be (during which Jason falls asleep). Cash shares his bieber with us, … [Read more...]

Podcast #75: Killing Abortionists Stops a Beating Heart

In this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors, Jason and Christian begin by discussing some of the blowback from last week’s interview with Dan Savage, and then take a series of voicemails on topics ranging from how sexy our voices are to whether we should have free college tuition, and from the refugee crisis to whether we truly mock God on our show. We address the issues of modern evangelical culture and persecution in America, after which Christian gets super pissed at his kids and we all get to hear what that sounds like. Dick Bush calls in for tips on becoming a good “agnostical,” and we introduce a new segment called “Go Home, Google, You’re Drunk” which leads to a discussion about elitism, tastemakers, and how stupid everyone is. We then spend … [Read more...]

Podcast #74: Guest Dan Savage

In this episode, the DXPs sit down with infamous sex advice columnist and gay-rights activist Dan Savage. Highlights include Christian telling a vagina-centric story that shocks Dan and renders him speechless (no easy feat in his line of work), and Dan connecting with Jason over their mutual love of musical theater (to the point where Dan refers to him as “Girl!”). Dan discusses his sexuality, the Catholicism with which he was raised, and the origins of his “It Gets Better” project. And in a shocking display of vulnerability no doubt occasioned by his drinking almost an entire bottle of sparkling rosé, Dan tips his hand and discloses the various insidious elements of the Gay Agenda™. The discussion finally turns to divorce, cheating, and … [Read more...]

Podcast #73: Compassion vs. Conservatism

In this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors, we begin by finally tackling the age-old question, “If you’re blind, how much does it matter if your spouse is hot or not?” As you may guess, a query of this magnitude has multiple layers of nuance, but we do give our best shot at an answer. We then resist a caller’s temptation to try to steal food from the mouth of a homeless, as well as engage with another caller about the difficulty of wanting to be yourself in public but not being free to. Another listener suggests a “new way” to conceive of God and Christianity, about which our resident agnostic is uncertain and doubtful (shocking, we know). We briefly discuss the thorny issue of “stumbling our weaker brother” before we dive into our main topic: the … [Read more...]

Podcast #72: Divine $h!t Happens

In our very first video-recorded episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors (courtesy of David and Kevin from the Charred Barrel Society that was recorded at the Toronto video production), Jason and Christian explore the merits of a new religion called “Pastafarianism,” after which we address the “War on Christmas” and the supposedly nationwide outcry over Starbucks’ new holiday cups in particular. We then take a listener’s question about how much a potential president’s religion matters before addressing the recent terrorist attacks in Paris. We spend a fair bit of time debating another caller’s question about whether prayer really works, which leads us down various rabbit holes such as why God allows evil, what role free will plays in God’s plan, and … [Read more...]

Podcast #71: Virtual Friends, Counsellors, and Confessors

This episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors opens with a brief discussion of whether Time magazine’s fourth most-powerful person in the world deserves the label, after which we take a call from (and are shocked at the libido of) the world’s most brilliant theoretical physicist. We turn our attention to the irony that is Seattle’s Amazon Books superstore, which is intertwined with the topic of technology, leading us to the not-so-futuristic issue of self-driving cars and whether they’ll be as “safe” as the ones that human idiots drive. We then touch upon Bernie Sanders’s views of marijuana and the gays’ plan to make the human race extinct. After our break we discuss Australian (ex)model Essena O’Neill and her renunciation of social media, on social … [Read more...]

Podcast #70: Jay Bakker Interview

In this episode the Drunk Ex-Pastors interview pastor-author Jay Bakker, “Christian agnostic” and son of Jim and Tammy Faye. We begin with a disavowal of anything we say since we do absolutely no research before weighing in on a topic, after which (to Christian’s annoyance) Jay and Jason talk about skateboarding for way too long. Jay relays his first and only experience with our former church, Calvary Chapel of Costa Mesa, which reduced him to tears (not the good kind). Jay then describes his experience becoming a gay-affirming Christian leader, which went pretty much how you would expect it to, after which he tells us about his church, Revolution. Our discussion then veers to the topic of the weakness and humanity of Christian leaders, and … [Read more...]

Podcast #69: You’re Not Gonna Live Forever (or Learn how to Fly)

This episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors begins with a heartwarming tale of “tough love,” that special brand of care that renders the phrase “kill them with kindness” all the more meaningful. We take a call from a listener demanding to know more about Jason’s life (which demand is rebuffed), and another from some guy who hates Mother Teresa and implies she was some sort of monster. We discuss one of the New Atheist’s controversial view of gun control, completely solve the riddle of reincarnation, and then tackle the issue of radical Islam. We are asked to weigh in on Justin Bieber’s wiener (which one of us has seen and the other has also seen but won’t admit it), and then take another call about the difference between Edward Snowden and Kim Davis. … [Read more...]

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