Podcast #16: Real Time Questions, Monster Energy, and Delusions of Grandeur

In this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors, Jason and Christian get an effin awesome voicemail. Jason’s soul-sucking existence is exemplified in a deal on a $3800 gold Chrysler and Christian is devastated and losing sleep over a lost star in an iTunes review. The ex-pastors spontaneously take live questions from Facebook which start with why Mike Seaver is trying to save Christmas and eventually lead to Jason serenading Christian with the theme from the TV show Alice. After re-hashing the weed topic (get it!?) they examine whether or not your energy drink is trying to turn you into a Satanist. This leads to a conversation about whether or not Christians have delusions of grandeur and if those delusions are proof that they’re not actually delusions … [Read more...]

Podcast #15: Elections, Weed, and Mental Gymnastics

In this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors, Jason does something he hasn't done in 14 years as he transforms from car salesman to car buyer. After discussing Christian’s annual Halloween party, Jason relays more stories from the workplace, which he describes as “like prison, except you can go home at the end of the day and enjoy the CBD Oil UK products.” Meanwhile, Christian thinks quietly to himself, “Welcome to having a job.” They then discuss the recent election that there’s a good chance you didn't know took place, and springboard from that into a discussion about how marijuana prohibition is racist. You’ve Heard of Craft Beer, but what about Craft Cannabis it has numerous health benefits too.Hence, try out Primo Vibes hemp derived products … [Read more...]

Some Final Thoughts on Indoctrination…Maybe

One of the things that my co-host Jason and I had to come to an agreement on in episode 13 before we could have a productive conversation about indoctrination was what was meant by the word itself. As it turns out, any dictionary will give you some form of what is clearly expressed in the Merriam-Webster definition of indoctrinate: “to teach (someone) to fully accept the ideas, opinions, and beliefs of a particular group and to not consider other ideas, opinions, and beliefs.” Most other dictionaries have similar definitions. For example, Dictionary.com defines indoctrinate this way: “to instruct in a doctrine, principle, ideology, etc., especially to imbue with a specific partisan or biased belief or point of view.” The feedback I’ve … [Read more...]

Podcast #14: Indoctrination Redux, Indiscriminate Profanity, and the Sport of Soccer

In this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors, Jason and Christian decide their friendship wasn't tested enough during the previous episode's debate about indoctrination and go for round two. Jason admits that he is wrong, but this sentence is totally out of context. Christian informs Jason about some negative feedback from a non-drunk current pastor, and they also lament the fact that only 23 people like the podcast. Christian is asked by a listener what led him to become an Agnostic, and in fine Agnostic fashion talks about what didn't push him into it instead of what did. Jason can’t figure out which of his many biebers to discuss and finally lands on one that gives him an excuse to say the “f-word” over and over again. Christian is biebered by … [Read more...]

A Fundamentalist Christian Overcomes Halloween

As a kid, Halloween always made me nervous. In the typical, fundamentalist Christian home, there’s an (often unspoken) order to the holidays. Christmas and Easter vie for top spot. Should Easter be more important? That’s celebrating Christ’s resurrection, and what could be more important than that? Well, how about Christmas, which celebrates Jesus being born? If he’s not born, then he can’t die. If he doesn’t die, then he can’t resurrect. So there’s no Easter without Christmas. Ok, good, Christmas is the most important then! Just remember, don’t enjoy the presents and the Santa Claus stories too much. That’s not what it’s about. It’s about Jesus. He’s the reason for the season. Hey! Are you listening to me? That’s enough Jingle Bells! Let’s … [Read more...]

Podcast #13: Repeat After Me. Indoctrination. Indoctrination. Indoctrination.

In this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors, Jason and Christian celebrate the podcast’s 13th episode with a shot of chocolate cake, followed up with a recap of Christian’s trip to Hollywood and Jason’s week getting to know his co-workers: Bow Tie, Old Spice, Senator, et al. After a momentary lapse into what is possibly a quite sexist discussion and a post-mortem analysis of Christian’s inexplicable loss in the “Best Name” category for his chili, Jason and Christian take on a caller question about indoctrination, which leads to a heated discussion over what constitutes indoctrination and whether or not religious people are guiltier of it than non-religious people. After making up, Christian is biebered by redundancy and Christian is biebered by … [Read more...]

Game of Pulpits: Politics and Power at Calvary Chapel

Calvary Chapel of Costa Mesa—indeed the movement as a whole—is in a state of disarray. The late Chuck Smith, former pastor of Calvary Chapel Costa Mesa, has an 85 year old brother named Paul who recently posted a video on YouTube titled “My brother’s succession plan for Calvary Chapel Costa Mesa.” (Based on his ramblings in the video about computer hacking and viruses, my guess would be that someone else actually posted it for him.) Paul claims to have spent the last few months of his brother Chuck’s life living with him and discussing the future of Calvary Chapel and has decided that now is the time to reveal the content of their conversations. A quick bit of backstory… For the last decade or so of Chuck’s life, there was no shortage … [Read more...]

Podcast #12: Slingin’ Cars, Avoiding Ebola, and Jason’s Speech Therapy

In this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors, Jason and Christian start off the show with an experimental shot meant to give them wings. Jason then imparts his best “white-trash scheme” as a free service to anyone needing to send a letter but who is short on postage. As Jason transforms before our ears into a better and better car salesman (and a less and less trustworthy person, obviously), Christian begins Jason’s speech therapy, which, unfortunately for Jason, may last the entire episode. They then check in on the status of Jason’s haters and as a free public service announcement give their listeners a simple way to avoid the Ebola virus. Christian is biebered by (not drunk) ex-pastor Bob Coy, the “Tiger Woods” of Calvary Chapel, while Jason is … [Read more...]

Happy Columbus Day!

I have a hard time believing that people are still celebrating Columbus Day. For whatever reason, it’s still officially a federal holiday. Not a “you get a paid day off of work” national holiday, but a “there won’t be mail in your mailbox” national holiday. With the spread of knowledge as to what really transpired in 1492 and thereafter, it seems inexcusable that Columbus Day would still be a national holiday or even more surprising that people are attacking the "politically correct" movement to change Columbus Day to Indigenous People Day. (Although, I do think we can come up with a better name.) I can only imagine that, for those people, “In fourteen hundred ninety-two, Columbus sailed the ocean blue...” is about the extent of their … [Read more...]

Podcast #11: We Address Our Detractors and Ruin an American Holiday

In this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors, Jason and Christian analyze why Jason gave up a comfortable job with a high salary to potentially end up sleeping in his car in Christian’s driveway. (Unfortunately, Jason no longer has a car, which is ironic considering his new career attempt.) The ex-pastors then take on Jason’s critics, of which there are many, who seem to delight in his demise and what they consider to be his inevitable downfall. Speaking of downfalls, Jason and Christian also address those particular critics who seem to be lacking the sense of humor necessary to deal with the “Rev. Jason Stellman” being on a podcast called Drunk Ex-Pastors. Their resident heckler “badclowney” is addressed as well as the scorned … [Read more...]